Diary of a Band: Odessa Stair
October 30, 2009 by nataly
Filed under Diary of a Band
Philadelphia is known for three things: cheese steaks, giving birth to the United States, and having a population full of assholes. This town goes through a lot of misery and tragedy every day. The music that comes out of here must be out of this world. It must be something that’s greasy, bloody and horrifying, but with a perverse pride that keeps you from moving to Bucks County, right?
Well, almost. Philly’s best rappers understand their home and have made some amazing psychodramas that could make you shit your pants, but our rockers stick to neutered genre exercises that betray the city’s true nature.
A lot of the motivation for Odessa Stair comes from when I started looking for musicians on Craigslist. Almost every person that contacted me was currently playing in a band that sounded like Weezer going through menopause, and Weezer already did that with Pinkerton, an album I stopped liking when I lost my virginity. How does a city so large and so crazy have such a pathetically small amount of good rock? We had to do something about this.
Every local musician should take tips from our sports fans. This is where we threw snowballs at Santa, batteries at our own mascot, chant “You took steroids!” at Manny Ramirez, and got so wild when the Flyers won their first Stanley Cup that the Flyers themselves had to fight their own fans. We should have the most disgusting, amazing bands ever!
Granted, it’s not all bad: I like Man Man, Pissed Jeans are good shit, and I thought Clockcleaner was the best Philly band ever. But for every Dead Milkmen there are tons of bands like Sunny Day in Glasgow, The Teeth, and Dr. Dog. I’d rather listen to my nephews’ Backyardigans CD than this cute, non-threatening crap. Odessa Stair has many goals, but the primary one is to knock Philadelphians out of their stupor and give them some real music to throw back at the assholes in New York, Chicago and L.A. That’s what we live for, isn’t it?
I’m not saying Odessa Stair is the ideal Philly band. The ideal Philly band sounds like Frankie Avalon played through a phaser at 78 RPM and the lead singer is some fat fuck from South Philly yelling songs about how he hates Jersey girls because they always give him crabs. But at the very least, let’s give this city something to be excited about.
PS: I would absolutely love to be proven wrong. If you know of any Philly band that would kick my ass, leave a comment.