Pitchfork Takes Over My World

Pitchfork, I love you. I really do. Sometimes I find myself reading you for hours on end. But you seem to have this creepy 1984-like ability to see and know about everything. You know all the bands I like, you interview all the bands I like and just when I think I am responsible for discovering a brand new band, I find you have already discovered them. A friend of a friend of a friend’s band who play in a dingy basement in the suburbs and have yet to release an album or even an EP, yup you know about them.

It is like we live in this dictatorship and Pitchfork is our Stalin. Telling us who to listen to, what music to like, and informing us of when a band is no longer cool. I tend to agree with most of Pitchfork’s rulings, but that doesn’t make it any less frustrating. I wish one day Pitchfork, you would make an enormous mistake and support a band that sucked. That would be the end of you! I could finally say to myself, I don’t agree with you Pitchfork! Take that!

I’d like to think I like the music I like because I think it’s great not because Pitchfork tells me so. Maybe it just so happens that Pitchfork likes the same music as me? Maybe I am the one dictating what is cool! Yeah, I think that’s better.

You know who else carries a pitchfork, Pitchfork? That’s right, the devil!